In The End There Can Be Only One Tree Hill

The year was 2003.  Those were much simpler times.  The world's tweens had not yet been ravaged by the horrible Bieber fever epidemic.  Love triangles involving vampires, werewolves, and I guess that girl is a zombie only existed in books (which had pages back then if you can believe that).  And once a week, the world put aside their differences and gathered to watch a little show called "One Tree Hill".

On Wednesday, April 4th, 2012 The CW is giving us one last chance to spend some time with that rag-tag group of kids from a little town called Tree Hill.  I always liked to think that was where they got the title of the show, but really it's anyone's guess.  When the series finale was announced it raised one serious question from deep inside me.  "One Tree Hill" is still a thing???  I was positive they ended that show at least five or six years ago.  The show's mysterious longevity baffled me.  It has been on the air as long as "Seinfeld" was.  I'll let that settle in for a second. 

We can eliminate great acting, captivating storylines, and loyal viewership as reasons for the shows long run right off the bat.  I have come up with a few alternative, but very plausible reasons this show has been the cockroach of teen dramas.

1) The Prank Theory - "One Tree Hill" would not be the first time that the entire world has conspired to play a large scale prank on me.  The prank theory is also the only plausible explanation for the popularity of Florence + The Machine.  I don't think it is completely unrealistic that everyone got together and kept the show on the air to see if I would keep watching.  Well world, the jokes on you, I have never watched a single episode.  All the info about the show I am getting from Wikipedia and a creepy 49 year old man that hangs out at the local Dairy Queen.

2) Espionage Communication - I think that it is a safe bet that a large portion of the world thought this show was gone at least as long as I have.  Maybe in the last few years, the CIA has been using the show to send vital information to covert operatives all over the world.  If any of these communications were intercepted by a civilian they would remain a secret because if someone tried to spill the beans they would have to admit that they watched the show.

3) The Chad Factor -  I'm just going to come right out and say it.  Chad Michael Murray is a national treasure.  If you have a way, like a television show, to showcase him and his gift to the world, you will do everything in your power to keep it around forever.  The giant hole in this theory is that Mr. Michael Murray left the show a few years ago.  My only thought is that they kept the show around just in case his acting career needed a couch to crash on when he was in town.

4) Inept Programming Executives - This is by far the most realistic of all my theories.  Season two was the only time in the series' run that the show cracked the coveted "Top 120".  And this was back when there was only between 75 and 100 channels to watch.  There was likely some very horrible FOX programming that was kicking this show's ass every week back then and they still kept it around.  Even now, in the reality television age, this show is probably always losing to a reality show about people who make lug nuts for a living.

Whatever the real reason this show lasted as long as it has will forever remain a mystery.  If I knew anything about the actual plot of the show I guess I could recommend some sort of gesture to show how much you appreciated it.  All I ask is that we let the show die with some dignity.  Please don't do one of those things where the fans mail an acorn or a colostomy bag to The CW in hopes they will bring it back.  Just let it go.  Trust me, Chad Michael Murray would have wanted it this way.